What to Do When You are Having an MRI

Lie there (or is it lay?)
Pretend you are a World War II fighter pilot, getting strafed by the bad guys.
Pretend you are in a game of "Space Invaders."
Wish that it wasn't so cold.
Wish that it wasn't so loud.
Wonder what the machine is doing.
Wonder what the picture looks like.
Think how nice it would be to move your head.
Try not to move your head.
Wonder what would happen if you moved your head.
Wonder how much this is going to cost.
Try to ignore the pain in your arm.
Try to ignore the pain in your head.
Wish you were in a more comfortable position.
Try deep breathing exercises; give up.
Try to think about what you'd do if you win the lottery; give up.
Try to sleep; give up.
Lie there.
Be glad you're not claustrophobic.
Wonder what would happen if you pushed the panic button.
Wonder what will happen if this thing in your head hasn't gotten smaller.
Wonder what will happen if the thing in you head has gotten bigger.
Think that it's not as bad as last time.
Think the attendants were nicer last time.
Wish you didn't have to drive home.
Wish you didn't have to be by yourself.
Wonder if you're going to have to do this again and again, for the rest of your life.
Be glad it's over.